Ontario Supreme Court Rules Against Getting Revenge The Really Really Long Way


Doug Ford, seen here explaining the denominations and regularity with which he expects to receive John Tory’s lunch money.

In a ruling handed down this morning by Ontario Supreme Court Justice Edward “Crickets” Belobaba, a question that has been asked many times, in many ways, by one person, has now been answered.

“No Doug. You can’t use the complicated mechanism of higher office as a vehicle for personal revenge. I don’t care what your brother told you.”

The ruling stated that while Justice Belobaba was aware that the citizens of Toronto handed Mr. Ford – and his ‘nation’ – a defeat in the 2014 municipal election, and were unbridled in their ‘No Dougs’ initiative during the recent provincial campaign, that this doesn’t constitute a justification for denying that city’s residents proportional representation at a municipal level.

“I see no evidence of dysfunction at City Hall, and would warn this government that this is a dangerous legal path to take, particularly for a political administration that was hurriedly cobbled together in the wake of a scandal.”

While the ruling does leave the door open for more immediate forms of revenge seeking, such as telling everyone that John Tory likes Jennifer Keesmaat, toilet-papering the bathrooms at Toronto City Hall, or pulling the fire alarm five minutes into a city council meeting, Belobaba cautioned against this.

“I mean, we’re going to know it’s you Doug.” 

The justice then went on to add an unusually pointed adjunct to his ruling.

“If I may offer a piece of advice from the bench. It’s time for you to stop governing based on punishing perceived wrongs. And start governing by creating perceived rights.”


1 reply »

  1. Oh! Oh! When do we see an anonymous letter penned by high placed administrators in the provincial government assuring us there are adults in Doug’s room?

    Liked by 1 person

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