*12.3 billion Earth years after the Big Bang.
1.5 billion years pass while they wait for a response.
Earthlings: Hey! Who’s this?
Aliens (simultaneously): Hello?
1.5 billion years go by.
Earthlings: Hello? Sorry, there’s a bit of a lag.
1.5 billion years.
Aliens: We’re aliens! We love light, physics, and swimming in methane.
Earthlings: Hello? It’s a bad line. Who did you say this was?
1.5 billion years. Universe nears critical expansion point, approaches the Big Rip.
Aliens: We’ll call you back.
Earthlings: Try calling us back.